Summertime Back in Time
I guess it’s officially summertime. I guess I’m officially seeing that now.
I’m seeing a lot of bare skin. I’m seeing a lot of bad scabs.
I’m seeing a lot of games, the kind that are played with sticks. I’m seeing a lot of food, the kind that is put on sticks.
I’m seeing a lot of bad hats. I’m seeing a lot of bad movies. (Well, no, I’m not seeing them. You are. But I’m not.)
I’m seeing that my readership has “gone fishing.”
I’m seeing that I’m checked out too. I’m seeing that I can’t form coherent sentences unless they’re relatively repetitive.
I hate summer. I hate hot. Put me on an iceberg in the Arctic with a grill and a beer and I’ll play my badminton there all day. Any day! Tomorrow? Please.
I think it’s time for a Quantum Leap back in time, back to when the summertime was grand and the living was easy.
1.) Summertime was parades. Back when they threw candy instead of pencil erasers. Back when no one cared when kids went into the street and got run over. Back before junior high when you pretty much threw yourself off the nearest water tower upon being seen at a parade — especially upon being seen at a parade that included your dad driving this.
2.) Summertime was summer fashion. Back when moms sewed homemade rompers. Back when terry cloth fabric meant rompers could double as beach towels.
Back when sandals with socks went unnoticed.
Back when plaid pants didn’t get you beat up.
3.) Summertime was water. Back before inflatable water parks were erected in backyards. Back when your mom could bastardize a Slip and Slide out of gardening tarp. Back when you could sit your butt down in three inches of water and be happy as a clam.
Or even just your foot.
Back when you’d drink from anything that dripped water — garden hoses, sprinklers, old pioneer pumps. And it all tasted like heaven. Even when it tasted like rust.
4.) Summertime was vacations. Back when you went to see boring things like rocks.
And more rocks.
And still more. (And back when you wore the same Boba Fett shirt every day.)
Back before digital cameras. Back before you noticed your vacation photos looked like crap but only after the film was already developed and paid for.
5.) Summertime was family gatherings. Back when your family looked like part of the Manson gang. Back when parents still let relatives who looked like part of the Manson gang spend time with their young children.
6.) Summertime was climbing things. Didn’t matter what. Trees. Houses. Fences.
This big net thing.
This big plaster dinosaur.
Whatever it takes. If you didn’t break a bone, you weren’t having fun.
And nearly every single moment of your summer was spent outside.
Which brings me to my final thought. Get off your screens. Get off my blog. Go outside. Like back when people used to go outside.
For chrissakes, it’s summertime.
And don’t forget your sunscreen.